Heinz Prechter, the man who brought the sunroof to the American automobile industry, died a while back. He was a tremendous person and I learned a lot from him. In honor of Mr. Prechter, here are 5 Cool Ideas for developing relationships.
1. People love for you to be proud.
The five most effective words you can use to build a relationship with someone are “I am proud of you.” If you do not use these words every day, you are not telling people what they want and need to hear. “Tell me more about yourself,” runs a close second. Be proud of everyone. Be proud of your employees and your co-workers and your boss. Be proud of your customers, your vendors, and your associates.
2. People love to be asked their opinion.
“What is your opinion?” is the most important question you can ever ask another person. “What do you think?” is a variation of this important question. Good communicators converse as if they are playing tennis. They hit the ball and then wait for someone to return it. Don’t follow the ball over the net by offering your opinion unless the other person asks. As people respond to you, they will find you psychologically attractive and your relationship will grow.
3. Etiquette is your “secret” to success.
Preface requests with the words “Would you please . . .?” and you will foster fast-growing relationships. Always make time to properly greet people and ask, “How are you?” Follow each greeting with a sincere compliment. Etiquette is a “secret” because many people don’t use it anymore.
4. Always show appreciation.
It’s not difficult to show appreciation, and there are lots of ways to convey the message. On a simple level, the words “thank you” go a long way in any relationship.
5. Be in the moment by being with one person at a time.
The most important word you can ever use with another person is that person’s name. It’s safe to say that a person’s name is his or her favorite word. Use the name at the beginning of a sentence to curry favor or build a fraternal relationship as in, “Does this idea sound good to you, Helen?” Use the name at the end of the sentence to leverage authority and keep the relationship official as in “Helen, do you think you can do this by Friday?”
To receive my periodic “5 Cool Ideas” for free, send an e-mail to 5CoolIdeas@EdisonHouse.com.
